Can a Relationship Last Without Intimacy?

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Why Intimacy Is Such A Big Deal In Relationship


Many people confuse intimacy with sex and passion; they are not and cannot be the same. Intimacy is the second element of Triangular Model of Love, it is nevertheless not less important than passion. I can, however, say that passion without intimacy is headed for doom; sooner or later storm will arise and sweep the relationship away like a house built on quicksand.
Intimacy or In-to-me-see as it is generally referred to is the “knowing” or “Knowledge side of love, for instance if I ask this question “who is Subomi?” someone that knows me in passing might describe my height, complexion and other physical attributes but someone that is intimate with me will describe me on a deeper level: my passion, vision, what drives me, what makes me feel relaxed and what pisses me off, see the difference?

What Intimacy Entails

Intimacy entails so much more as I discussed earlier, for you to really understand the intimacy side of Triangular model of love you have to know what true intimacy entails, let’s go over them one after the other.

1. Intimacy Entails Knowing the Soul

Passion entails knowing the body while intimacy entails knowing the soul. Our being consists of three parts: the body, the spirit and the soul, these three parts are embedded in one part which is the body. When it comes to Passion you get fascinated with the body but when it comes to intimacy you get fascinated with the second and inner part that cannot be seen with the eyes, which is the soul.
The soul of a human is that part that gets hungry for companionship while the body part gets hungry for physical, and material things and of course sex. Have you heard of soul mates before? When you are intimate with someone you know them on a soul to soul level. Many people know their partner’s body like the back of their hand but they are clueless when it comes to their partner’s soul.

2. Intimacy Is Friendship on a Deeper Level

Intimacy is friendship on a deeper level, there are friends and there are friends, In true love, you become more than friends to your partner. Have you ever heard of this before “If you tell me not to tell anyone about this it doesn’t include Subomi”: it means there is nothing I can’t tell her without fear of being judged or being misunderstood.
When you are intimate with someone you will be able to tell them what you have done well and what you have done wrong because you know they will see the motive, not the act. Many people don’t have much to talk about in a relationship or they pretend all the time because they think their partner can’t handle their bad side; it will surely come out one day and backfire.

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